Dear Anabelle May...

Dear Anabelle May,

Today at 10:27 am, I will have known you for one whole year. For a whole year of mornings, I have awoken to your sweet song over the monitor. For a whole year of nights, I have kissed you at bed time. For a whole year of days, you have been a blessing to me! I'll never forget those first minutes after you were born. I have never heard a funnier or a more pitiful little cry than yours, deep and mournful, as if to say "This is the worst day of my whole life!" It was one of the best days of my whole life, and you made me laugh. I hesitated to give you a kiss, but when I did the room went fuzzy, like it was just you and me - alone. Your hair was so soft, your skin was so warm, you were just perfect. Your Nina found that you had a deep dimple on your shoulder, like adding sprinkles to ice cream, you just kept getting sweeter. I still kiss that dimple every time you get out of the bath, it reminds me of the day we met.

We had some time all by ourselves, I stared at you, and couldn't believe that I was actually loving a second baby as much as my first! I wanted to show you to Evie so badly, I just couldn't wait to introduce my treasures to each other. Then the nurses took you to the nursery for a bath, they said it would only take about an hour, but it actually took two and felt like nine! I finally called the nursery and said "This is Anabelle's mom, and I want my baby back!" When they finally rolled you into the room, it was like slow motion from the time your crib passed the thresh hold to the time we were snuggled together again. Perfection. Next Sissy came, she crawled up in bed with us, she kissed and "boinked" you over and over. To this day, I still don't know what the "boinking" was about, except that your sweet face must have been simply irresistible to Evie too. To be "boinked" is to be loved (I think).

At night time, you started to choke and you turned blue. I thought my heart was breaking in those moments when Daddy was working on you and I fumbled to call for the nurse. You finally coughed and turned pink again, but I was so frightened. Daddy and I decided to take turns staying awake to watch you. You could have gone to the nursery to be watched, but you were too precious to let out of our sight. You slept right beside my bed in your little crib, we were separated by a foot of space and a quarter inch of plastic, but I'd never felt closer to you. It's funny that you grew inside of me for eight and a half months, but seeing you was the closeness that made me feel whole.

I have loved everyday of this first year with you, and everyday (as impossible as it always seems) I have loved you more than the day before. In one of your birthday cards (that of course made me cry) your auntie wrote, "We pray that you grow up in grace and wisdom. May your second year of life be full of joy!" I couldn't have said it better myself! I love you, My Anabelle May, happy 1st birthday!

Love Always and Forever,

Mommy